Tag: self-esteem

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Community Drop the ME and focus on the OTHERS Self-Improve

The Secret in Life is Being Likable: Embracing Self-Affirmation and Health for Success

In the quest for personal and professional fulfillment, being likable emerges as a pivotal trait. This characteristic is more than just a surface-level attribute; it is deeply rooted in self-affirmation and holistic health. As Di Tran, the acclaimed author of “Drop the ME and Focus on the Others,” suggests, the journey to likability begins with a profound appreciation and understanding of oneself.

Self-Affirmation: The Cornerstone of Likability

Self-affirmation lays the foundation for being likable. It is the process of recognizing and valuing one’s worth, abilities, and potential. This positive self-regard fosters confidence, which naturally translates into a more affable and engaging personality. When individuals like themselves, they exude a sense of ease and authenticity, making them more approachable and relatable.

Tran emphasizes the significance of self-affirmation in his series of books. He argues that embracing one’s strengths and weaknesses with a positive mindset is crucial. This acceptance not only enhances self-esteem but also equips individuals to face challenges with resilience and grace, qualities that are inherently attractive to others.

Holistic Health: A Balanced Approach

Likability extends beyond mental well-being to encompass physical health. A healthy body contributes to a healthy mind, creating a synergy that radiates positivity. Regular exercise, a balanced diet, and adequate rest are essential components of physical health that directly impact one’s demeanor and interaction with others.

Tran’s philosophy aligns with this holistic approach. He advocates for a lifestyle that balances physical activity with mental and emotional care. Exercise, for instance, is not just about maintaining physical fitness; it’s also a powerful tool for mental clarity and stress relief. A person who takes care of their physical health is often more energetic, positive, and productive, traits that are highly valued in both personal and professional contexts.

Practical Applications in Business and Personal Life

In the business world, likability can be a game-changer. Tran’s success in his ventures is a testament to the power of being a personable leader and team member. Likable individuals foster better collaborations, create positive work environments, and often lead more effectively. They are adept at building relationships, which is a critical skill in networking and client interactions.

In personal life, likability enhances one’s social interactions and relationships. Being pleasant and easy to work with attracts a diverse range of individuals, fostering a rich and supportive social circle. This, in turn, contributes to a higher quality of life and overall happiness.

Conclusion: The Power of Being Yourself

Ultimately, the secret to being likable is not about striving to please everyone or losing oneself in the process. It’s about being authentically yourself, with a focus on self-growth and health. As Tran eloquently puts it, dropping the ‘me’ and focusing on others doesn’t mean neglecting oneself. Instead, it’s about finding a harmonious balance where self-care and empathy go hand in hand. Embracing this philosophy not only makes one likable but also paves the way for a fulfilling and successful life.

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Drop the FEAR and Focus on the FAITH Self-Improve

The Habit of Doing What You Don’t Want to Do: Overcoming Resistance and Cultivating Discipline

In an era where comfort and convenience are often prioritized, doing something we don’t want to do every day seems counterintuitive, if not outright difficult. Nonetheless, embracing this practice can prove transformative, instilling discipline, enhancing resilience, and fostering personal growth.

The Theory of Habit Formation and the Brain

Habit formation is a central part of human psychology. According to a study published in the European Journal of Social Psychology, it takes an average of 66 days for a behavior to become automatic or habitual (Lally et al., 2010). This process involves the gradual shift of the action from the prefrontal cortex, the area of the brain responsible for decision-making and self-control, to the basal ganglia, which manages routine behaviors.

Performing an unwanted task daily can facilitate this transition, making the action part of your routine and decreasing the emotional and mental resistance associated with it.

Overcoming Resistance

Steven Pressfield, in his book “The War of Art,” discusses the concept of “resistance” as a force that prevents us from doing what we ought to do. He suggests that the key to overcoming resistance is “turning pro,” i.e., showing up and doing the work, even when we don’t feel like it (Pressfield, 2002).

Applying this to the daily task you’re resisting, the more you engage in it, the more you ‘normalize’ the behavior and reduce the emotional discomfort associated with it. This approach aligns with exposure therapy in psychology, which involves confronting and gradually becoming accustomed to something that causes fear or anxiety (Craske, 2019).

Cultivating Discipline and Resilience

Adopting a habit of doing something you don’t want to do every day is a powerful way to develop discipline and resilience. Discipline is about making choices that align with your long-term goals, despite short-term discomfort. Meanwhile, resilience is your ability to withstand or recover quickly from difficult conditions. By consistently overcoming resistance, you become more adept at facing challenges and bouncing back from setbacks.

The Benefits

This practice can have profound benefits. It can increase your productivity by eliminating procrastination and enhancing focus. It can foster personal growth by pushing you out of your comfort zone and encouraging you to take on new challenges. Moreover, it can enhance your self-esteem and confidence as you witness your capacity to overcome difficulties and achieve goals.

Conclusion

While the idea of doing something we don’t want to do every day may seem daunting, the rewards are substantial. By embracing discomfort and overcoming resistance, we can cultivate discipline, enhance resilience, and foster personal growth.

References

  1. Lally, P., Van Jaarsveld, C. H. M., Potts, H. W. W., & Wardle, J. (2010). How are habits formed: Modelling habit formation in the real world. European Journal of Social Psychology, 40(6), 998–1009.
  2. Pressfield, S. (2002). The War of Art: Break Through the Blocks and Win Your Inner Creative Battles. Black Irish Entertainment LLC.
  3. Craske, M. G. (2019). Exposure Therapy and CBT for Anxiety and Fear: From Principle to Practice. The Guildford Press.
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Early Childhood Education Leadership Development Self-Improve

The Benefits of Early Childhood Activities with Parents: Why It Matters

As parents, we often wonder what we can do to help our children succeed and thrive in life. One of the most important things we can do is to engage in activities with our children during their early years. Not only does this provide a fun and rewarding experience for both parent and child, but it also has numerous positive and proven consequences for children’s development.

One of the most significant benefits of early childhood activities with parents is enhanced cognitive development. As explained by child development expert Dr. Laura Berk in her book “Child Development,” the experiences children have in their early years can shape the architecture of their developing brains, leading to improved cognitive skills such as problem-solving, reasoning, and critical thinking. Activities such as reading, playing games, and engaging in imaginative play with parents can all help stimulate a child’s brain development, leading to lasting benefits.

Another benefit of early childhood activities with parents is improved language development. According to child language development expert Dr. Patricia Kuhl, author of “The Scientist in the Crib,” talking and reading to children during their early years can help build their vocabulary and language skills, which can benefit them later in life. By engaging in activities such as reading books and telling stories, parents can help their children develop a love for language and communication.

Engaging in activities with parents during early childhood can also help strengthen the bond between parent and child. As child development expert Dr. Edward Hallowell explains in his book “The Childhood Roots of Adult Happiness,” a strong and supportive relationship with parents is crucial for children’s emotional well-being and success in life. Activities such as playing games, going on outings, and spending quality time together can all help build a strong and lasting bond between parent and child.

The benefits of early childhood activities with parents extend beyond just emotional and cognitive development. As Dr. Kenneth R. Ginsburg explains in his book “Building Resilience in Children and Teens,” engaging in positive activities with parents can help children develop coping skills and reduce the risk of developing mental health problems later in life. By engaging in activities that promote physical exercise, such as playing sports or going on walks together, parents can also help promote a healthy lifestyle for their children.

In conclusion, the benefits of early childhood activities with parents are numerous and profound. From cognitive and language development to emotional well-being and physical health, the benefits of engaging in activities with parents during early childhood are clear. As child development expert Dr. T. Berry Brazelton once said, “The most important thing parents can do is to spend time with their children. It is the single most important investment in their lives and in the future of our world.”

References: Berk, L. (2014). Child Development. Pearson. Ginsburg, K. R. (2011). Building Resilience in Children and Teens. American Academy of Pediatrics. Hallowell, E. M. (2003). The Childhood Roots of Adult Happiness. Ballantine Books. Kuhl, P. K. (2001). The Scientist in the Crib. William Morrow Paperbacks.

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Leadership Development Self-Improve

Mom and I Walked to the Dumpster – A Pivotal Moment That Shaped Who I Am Today – Di Tran

Viet Bao Louisville - Di Tran - Drop the ME and Focus on the OTHERS - BOOK by Di Tran
Viet Bao Louisville - Di Tran - Drop the ME and Focus on the OTHERS - BOOK by Di Tran

SUMMARY

In this section of Chapter one of “Drop the ME and Focus on the OTHERS” by Di Tran, the author recounts a childhood experience that shaped his self-determination and will to protect his family. His mother insisted they retrieve a dirty mattress from a dumpster despite his initial hesitation. He learned the value of determination and the importance of family from his mother’s actions. Later, their good fortune continued when Catholic Charities offered to provide movers to help them transport any items they needed to their new location. The author reflects on the lessons he learned from his mother about the will of God and the importance of effort in achieving success.

Di Tran - Drop the ME and Focus on the OTHERS
Di Tran – Drop the ME and Focus on the OTHERS – BOOK

MOM AND I WALKED TO THE DUMPSTER – THE #1 REASON I AM WHO I AM TODAY

“Mom, it’s not like we never slept on a dirt floor before. We were dirt poor, and I used to sleep on the ground in our mud hut. How hard can it get? We can handle this and sleep on the floor without a mattress.” I tried to comfort Mom about not having a mattress for us to sleep on, but more importantly, I was trying to avoid the activity of digging through the dumpsters. I realize that poor was not the point, now that I reflect on and understand why I hesitated. I meant what I said about being poor, and it was truthful, and it would have been totally fine. However, I was uncomfortable digging through trash. As poor as we had been in the past, there was never a time that we dug through trash hunting for items. First, Vietnam was and still is a third-world country, and especially in a poor village like ours, there was no government agency that picked up trash, nor did the people pile their trash in one place. Second, poor people’s trash in Vietnam would never have generated anything worth taking. Third, the idea of digging through trash is the lowest of the low in our mindset, and it is hard to fathom. At the age of 12, I already knew how this would affect me in terms of my self-esteem and perceived status in life. There could have been nothing worse for me at that moment in time. This was the pivotal point that made me who I am today.

Firmly and carefully, Mom stated, “No, Son. At the least, my children will have what other children have, even if it is of the worst quality, “ in this case, a mattress. “I will not settle for less than this,” she responded to my hesitation. Today, as I write this book, I now have three children of my own, ages five, six, and seven. As a parent, I strongly feel what my mom meant at that moment. Her love for her children and family has always surpassed her fear of self-doubt, public criticism, and people’s thoughts of her. Most importantly, she was determined to make the best out of a bad situation, and she knew what that minimum was: a mattress.  That was her driving force, her only thought, and nothing could stop her from achieving that goal. I learned self-determination from Mom, and the level of this became explosive when her children’s interests were concerned in comparison to the norm. Not having a mattress was not an option, and so I tagged along with Mom to the dumpster.

Di Tran and His Mom – Dig the Dumpster for their first mattress in USA

The dumpster was a few blocks from our house, and Mom and I walked there in the cold weather; there was even light snow falling. We were both lightly dressed, wearing our tropical layered clothes, but we did not feel physical discomfort, only the mental heaviness of what we were about to do, dig in the dumpster. For the first time in my life, I felt like an adult man at this age of 12. I was on a mission with Mom, for something that we would hopefully only have to do only once in our lifetime. I felt a strong sense of determination that I inherited from her, and this made me happy. I also began to recognize at this exact moment who I must become, a man of the family with a strong level of determination and will to protect my family at all levels. There was no shame, no hardship, and no criticism that would interfere with the focus we had on our family, as Mom and I walked to the dumpster. “There it is, Son. Get in there and pull it out for me. I will pull it and you push from inside.” Mom directed me to the dumpster where the dirty mattress was. It was wet, heavy, dirty, and stained gray. It smelled of trash and urine. I no longer hesitated and put forth all my effort to get the mattress out from the dumpster and drag it to the temporary home, which we would soon have to exit and move into the Americana apartments. I accomplished something significant for myself, my mom and my family, and I felt quite satisfied. “We did it! Our family now has a mattress!” Mom exhaled with a smile, and seemingly lightened heart.

THE WILL OF GOD

Unexpectedly, our Vietnamese translator from Catholic Charities came over to the house where my mom and I stood after our accomplished mission. The translator looked at us and glanced at the dirty mattress and spoke, “Catholic Charities has decided that this temporary house that you are staying in now, will no longer be used for this purpose after your family leaves. Therefore, they will throw away everything in this house after you leave. You are free to take anything you need to the Americana Apartments.” “Anything and everything we can use?” Mom asked the translator. “Yes, but not only that. Catholic Charities will provide the movers with trucks to help you move them into your new location, since they would have to throw all these away anyway.” “Isn’t this the will of God, Son?” Mom asked me when retelling this story. “Son, remember God will never give you more than what you can handle.” She taught us about faith in God. “But also know that life is about giving all the effort you can by maximizing your brain and physical strength for good; then God will take on the rest.” I gain greater comprehension of Mom’s teachings as I grow and live through life’s challenges. I can only recognize God through doing, not sitting, praying, or waiting for things to happen. Only when I maximize my God-given capability, can I say: “God, now you do your magic based on what I did.” God never seems to never fail me and my family.

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Self-Improve

The Affirmative Alphabet: A-Z Positive Declarations for Self-Empowerment – Dedicated by Di Tran

This collection of affirmations, entitled “The Affirmative Alphabet: A-Z Positive Declarations for Self-Empowerment,” is dedicated by Di Tran, author of “Drop the FEAR and Focus on the FAITH.” In this compilation, each letter of the alphabet is paired with a motivational word, along with an affirmation statement starting with “I am.”

As Di Tran learned from some of the most famous authors, we are who we are because of who we say we are. And by repeatedly affirming our positive qualities and attributes, we align ourselves with the law of vibration and the law of attraction. These powerful laws state that we attract into our lives what we think and feel about ourselves, and the more we repeat these affirmations, the more we begin to embody the qualities we declare.

In the words of Louise Hay, the renowned self-help author and motivational speaker, “We are each responsible for our own experiences.” So, let us embrace this responsibility and use these affirmations as a tool to shape our thoughts, feelings, and experiences in a positive and empowering way.

Read A-Z to your kids and yourself

A – “I am Aspiring” – To have a strong desire or ambition to achieve something.

B – “I am Brave” – Showing courage in the face of danger or difficulty.

C – “I am Courageous” – Possessing or displaying courage, bravery.

D – “I am Determined” – Firmly resolved to do something; having a strong will.

E – “I am Empowered” – Having the authority or power to do something.

F – “I am Fearless” – Lacking fear or courage.

G – “I am Gracious” – Kind and polite, especially towards someone of lower social status.

H – “I am Humble” – Not having or showing any feelings of superiority or arrogance.

I – “I am Inspiring” – Encouraging, motivating, or giving hope to someone.

J – “I am Joyful” – Feeling great pleasure or happiness.

K – “I am Kind” – Having a friendly, generous, and considerate nature.

L – “I am Loving” – A strong feeling of affection and caring towards someone.

M – “I am Motivated” – Having a strong reason or incentive to do something.

N – “I am Noble” – Of high moral character and values, and showing great generosity.

O – “I am Optimistic” – Having a positive outlook on life and expecting favorable outcomes.

P – “I am Passionate” – Having or showing intense enthusiasm and excitement.

Q – “I am Quality” – A characteristic or feature that distinguishes something from others.

R – “I am Resilient” – Able to recover quickly from difficulties, setbacks or hardships.

S – “I am Strong” – Possessing physical or mental power and determination.

T – “I am Tenacious” – Persistent and determined, not giving up easily.

U – “I am Understanding” – Comprehending, empathy or sympathy towards someone or something.

V – “I am Vibrant” – Full of energy, life, or enthusiasm.

W – “I am Wise” – Having good judgement and knowledge, and making sound decisions.

X – “I am Extraordinary” – Exceptional, remarkable, or outstanding in some way.

Y – “I am Youthful” – Having the qualities of youth, such as being energetic, lively, or fresh.

Z – “I am Zestful” – Full of enthusiasm and excitement for life.

Call to Action:

If you’re looking for a simple yet effective way to improve your self-esteem and boost your confidence, try reading these affirmations from A to Z every day for 21 days. Not only can you read these affirmations to yourself, but also consider reading them to your kids. This will not only benefit you, but also instill positive beliefs and attitudes in the next generation.

Family Night Time Read

Research has shown that it takes about 21 days to form a new habit, so why not make affirmations a daily habit for yourself and your family? By repeating these positive statements every day for 21 days, you will start to see a shift in your self-perception and how you feel about yourself. You’ll also become more aware of your thoughts and begin to replace negative self-talk with positive affirmations.

So, take this call to action and commit to a 21-day journey of self-discovery and self-empowerment. Read these affirmations out loud, and really focus on the words and the message they convey. The result will be a more confident, positive, and motivated version of yourself.